Christ On A Cracker

by Last Place Finishers

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lawk They did good songs. Favorite track: The Dragon Bitch.
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Recorded June 2016 at The Vole Hole.


released August 14, 2016

All music and lyrics by Last Place Finishers.

- Matt Morris: Vocals, Guitar

- Alex Murbarger: Vocals, Bass, Guitar, Percussion

- Josh Little: Drums, Percussion

Cover photo by Shotgun Morris.

Artwork by Jim Ripoff.



all rights reserved


Last Place Finishers Pocatello, Idaho

Bashing away at instruments.

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Track Name: The Dragon Bitch
This town's torn to pieces
(This globe is torn to pieces)
This town's torn to pieces
(These towns are smashed to breadcrumbs)
I have acquired the taste of distractions
(But when I was growing up I thought I belonged)
No more attitude
(Am I a full blown miracle? Or just an act of God?)
I've lost my attitude
(I think I'm a monkey so I'll let you decide which one's wrong)
I am the master of fucking myself over.

I'm not sure I was designed to be here.
I might not be a human being.
I might be a figment of mother nature's imagination.

You are learning when you take the me out of home
That all that's left is a building with two windows broken.

Mother nature's gotta go put her face on
I'll be right back
I've gotta go burn mine off.
Track Name: Whiskers
I was an only child
So growing up my best friend was my ideal self.

I wasn't that bad
But I wasn't much better than hell.

I was a tabby and a lion both at once.
Track Name: The World's Most Laziest Ghost
I drove on the same road I used to drive down.
I didn't notice you were there with your thumb out.
I picked you up and said, "Girl where you headed?"
You said, "Nowhere."
"Well that's where I'm headed."

So we got down the road and things were quiet.
I asked where'd you come from.
You said "It doesn't matter."
"Keep on driving, keep on driving, keep on driving."
We're both going nowhere.
So I just stepped down.

I didn't notice it.
You had a lazy eye.

Tired of the conversations
This agreement
Where a destination splits
And we won't see each other ever again
This is a part time relationship.
I drive you to where you need to be
Because I don't wanna meet your family
And see all the things you see
I wanna be by myself.
Don't wanna put you through my own hell.

So get the fuck out my truck.
Track Name: Orange Juice After Toothpaste
I am moving to Canada
Because I need some attention.
Not to mention I think I will feel better there
I'll finally be outside so I'll finally have some fresh air.

Had a dream I took a trip to Winnipeg.
I thought it would be way better there.
But I felt the same as I did here.
Sometimes I forget all the crucial things.

Sometimes I forget that nightmares are dreams too.

I am craving orange juice every night after I brush my teeth
But I know that's just the self destructive part inside of me.

A construction worker that bought a sports car
And blamed the world for his problems.
But me being young and unsure is the bigger problem here?

Maybe you were right.
This world is too god damn weird.
Track Name: Pig With A Pilot's License
There's something going on
That I can't quite explain.
It's got something to do with all the things I say.
I'm a simple life of product to be used
I would run away from here
But I lost my shoes.

Lost my shoes, don't tell me what to do.

I'm such a klutz
I bang knees with my junk drawer.
I'm knocking three year old receipts I really don't need anymore on the floor.
I look like an asshole in a polo shirt.
But the fitted collar makes me look like I know what I'm doing
Even though I really don't.

There's something going on
I don't know what it is.
Covered my bare feet with dog shit and piss.
And I would get a fucking job
But I lost my god damn shoes
I'm a sad Fred Flintstone
My dinosaur needs food.

Dinosaur excrement.
Track Name: Trash/The Hell In Hello
Driving around.
All the trash truck drivers seem so happy.
Maybe I should have got myself into trash.

It wouldn't have been the first time I looked like a dog.
But maybe a smile would have hid my rash.


I met a girl
Spent all my money on some flowers.
I gave them to her
She threw them away.

And I figured it out now
It doesn't mean anything to me.

I called my mom
She answered then she hanged up (or is it hung?).
I called my friends
They never picked up.

And I figured it out now
It doesn't mean anything to me.

I could be your star
Be the only thing that shines in your heart.

I'm a fucking tree with no leaves.
I'm a mountain top with no top peak.
I'm a simple word for expecting people to call me boring.

So if you see me with my heart out
Don't try to pick up the rest.

So if you see me with my heart out
You'll know that I tried my best.
Track Name: Twenty Grams of Pain Helps Build Lean Muscle
Falling out the window
I find it hard to land on my feet
I almost got a sore throat
I didn't mean that to sound the way that it seems.
Based on instincts
You should have seen me anymore
I have a knack for breaking things.
I didn't mean that to sound the way that it seems.

I'm not always kind
So watch me run and hide.
If family means everything then why does it mean nothing to me?

Tell me what I gotta do to get this through to you
That not everything is going your way
I can never concentrate on topics or a small debate
I guess it's safe to say I'm losing my brain.

At least there's a small release of chemicals inside of me
That's indicating when I need to breath
I'm hoping I'll stop talking when I notice you're not listening
I'm gonna break free.
Gonna have to leave.

I'm not always kind.
So watch me run and hide.
If family means everything then why does it mean nothing to me?

If family means everything
Then I must mean nothing.
I spend too much of my time alone.